Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, in his book titled “The Little Prince”, states, “Love is not looking at each other, it is looking together in the same direction.” In other words, love is teamwork.

The over-rated “can’t-live-with-out-the-other” definition of love is untrue and very harmful. TV, movies, and the other forms of media have brainwashed us  into thinking that this is what we should aim for in life, that is, besides making lots of doe. A common way of thinking is, “With love, nothing else matters”. WRONG! Love isn’t omnipotent. It certainly doesn’t overrule every other aspect of life.

But let’s get to defining love. True love occurs when two people, of similar interests and values (values being the most important) are united by a common goal. The creation of a happy prosperous family is a common goal, but there are plenty of others.

Lovers also tend to confuse sexual attraction with true love. Do not make this mistake. One way to avoid this is by mentally taking away you girl’s beauty, her youth, her money, her fame, and every other superficial quality, until all that’s left is an old and physically ugly person. Then ask yourself The Four Questions:

1. Are you and your girl bonded by a common goal? It has to be a significant goal, now.
2. After you take away every superficial quality from your girl, do you still want to share your life with her?
3. Does you relationship with this person motivate your strengths and make you acquire new strengths? Because, if it motivates you weaknesses and vice versa, you’re on the wrong track.
4. Does this relationship harmonize with the original life goals that you had before the relationship? If it derails you from your dreams and expectations in life, you’re on the wrong track.

If and ONLY if all four answers are yes, are you in love with your girl, and therefore ready to get married.

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